Entire Class: *forgets to do homework*
Teacher: Well I guess I won’t count it
So it’s my birthday and I’m opening gifts. I open the wrapped box from my uncle.
I open the box, and find a $50 gift card, yes? But wait, there’s Styrofoam. There’s more.
Then I remove the Styrofoam…
A FUCKING LEGLESS LEGO LEGOLAS
mY UNCLE GOT ME A LEGLESS LEGO LEGOLAS
bEST BIRTHDAY GIFT EVER
he then later gave me the legs.
LEGO LEGOLAS’ LEGO LEGS
Are you Luna Lovegood
Loony Luna Lovegood Lavishly Loving LEGO Legolas’s LEGO Legs
major turn offs
- timed missions
- manual save points
- chase sequences
My best friend (who works at State Farm) just called me, so excited, saying she met a cute boy at work, whose name is Jake. She likes Jake from State Farm.She sounds hideous.
Well she’s a guy so
friend: you speak french?
friend: say something in french!
me: je suis venu ici pour passer un bon moment et je suis honnêtement sentir si attaqué dès maintenant
WE NEED FEMINISM BECAUSE WHEN LANCE ARMSTRONG GOT CANCER AND LOST A TESTICLE IT WAS ALL ABOUT HIS HEALTH AND HOW INSPIRATIONAL HE WAS BUT WHEN ANGELINA JOLIE GETS A DOUBLE MASTECTOMY TO PREVENT HERSELF FROM GETTING CANCER, IT’S ALL ABOUT HOW SHE WON’T BE A SEX SYMBOL ANYMORE AND HOW MEN ARE OFFENDED CAUSE SHE WON’T BE AN OBJECT FOR THEM
I’m pretty sure I reblog this already but this need to be reblog again
wtf is this bullshit
Good old DC. Could always count on them to take one step forward on batgirl’s awesome new uniform, then sprint miles back with this bullshit
Walk up in the DC offices like…
I have a story.
So my sister got run over by a car once. It was a pretty big deal. Well like a year later she got into a little fender bender and was really bent out of shape about it, so I went and got her a cake.
When I put in my order for the cake, the guy at the bakery asked, “Do you want it to say anything?”
And with a perfectly straight face, I said, “‘Sorry you got hit by a car again.’”
He narrowed his eyes a moment, then nodded and wrote it down, and took it to kitchen to get the writing done.
All the way from the back of the kitchen, I hear a woman shout, “‘Again’?!”